My Dad

My Dad loves ice cream, Dots, nonparels, Hershey bars, donuts, pizza, spaghetti and meatballs, orange juice in the morning, and vanilla cake with buttercream icing from Publix.

And he likes to share...most of the time :)

My Dad is humble and laughs at himself easily.

My Dad is a good listener...when he hasn't already figured out what your problem is before you start talking :)

By God's grace, my Dad realized Jesus was the Way, the Truth and the Life, and shares it with anyone who will listen by loving them where they are and living it out.

My Dad loves the rain- to walk in it, listen to it, and watch it.

My Dad loves to go out to eat....particularly to the Waffle House...any Waffle House.

My Dad loves peaceful, instrumental music.

My Dad likes to sit by himself in the morning and read his Bible.

My Dad is a teacher at heart, and he teaches all the time even if he's not trying to :)

My Dad is doing things for other people most of the time.

My Dad always does his best.

My Dad likes to take a 15 minute nap once each day.

My Dad loves Stargate, NCIS, 24, and going to the movies.

My Dad loves watching sports, but he refuses to let them get in the way of his time with his family.

My Dad lost two beloved children to heaven sooner than he expected, and never wavered in his belief that God is always, always good.

My Dad loves and treasures his wife.

My Dad pours into other men what he has learned in this journey of life.

My Dad loves his grandkids. He loves to have brown cows with them and get down on their level and hold them and teach them what he knows.

My Dad loves to read and always let me buy as many books as I wanted. :)

My Dad loves me, and he does it well.

My Dad always points me to the One who knows everything and loves perfectly.

Thank You, Jesus, for my Dad and all the ways He reveals to me who You are!

Our Response to God

Was re-reading Louie Giglio's book, "The Air I Breathe". Just wanted to share some awesome quotes!

"Worship is our response to God. In other words, we don't initiate worship, God does.

He reveals; we respond.

He discloses; we respond.

He unveils, we respond.

He chooses to show us how amazing He is; we say, 'God, You are amazing!'

Our whole relationship with God works the same way:

He loves. We love in return.

He calls. We answer.

He leads. We follow."

The Peace of Knowing

The Most Important Thing about You is What You Think About God.

“God is not a belief to which you give your assent. God becomes a reality whom you know intimately, meet everyday, one whose strength becomes your strength, whose love, your love. Live this life of the presence of God long enough and when someone asks you, “Do you believe there is a God?” you may find yourself answering, “No, I do not believe there is a God. I know there is a God.” ~Ernest Boyer, Jr.

Truth to Hang Your Hat On

I’m sitting here with my coffee and my computer outside on the backporch, listening to all the birds. Chloe-my loyal, shamelessly loving and I have found very jealous chocolate lab-and Snowy-my Dad and Gerri's beautiful, all-white husky with blue eyes- who is the sweetest, most gentle dog ever- were both out here with me, but apparently Snowy likes it better inside even if I am not there! :)

Chloe has of course stayed faithfully by my side. It struck me how whenever I get up, she immediately gets up and follows. She doesn’t even pause to look at me and ask, “Are you moving AGAIN?”, or “Are you really going somewhere else or are you coming back? Because if you are coming back I might just stay here in my comfy spot.” She just gets up, without question, and follows me.

That is what God wants me to do. Follow without question in absolute, peaceful trust. He has promised it will get easier each time I do it- because He has proven Himself faithful over and over- and He is right. As painful as this is, it has been remarkably easier to just get up and follow. I still ask the questions. Why? Why now? Why again? Why Dad and Gerri again? Why does Nick have to go through this? Lose 4 sibings? Is that really necessary? How can I live and not be afraid that some freak accident could take my kids or Phil at any moment?

But I ask them from a different place. I'm not accusing Someone I don't trust. I'm crying out to the One who I know- with the certainty of repeated, never-failing experience- I can trust completely. I heard a song the other day that explains this perfectly: "So many questions without answers, Your promises remain".

It’s quiet because Shala took the kids yesterday morning, and I’m picking them up tonight. She is such an incredible friend! All my friends have been quietly doing things behind the scenes to ease this burden- making meals, sending Bible verses, praying, listening, sharing words of gentle wisdom, making me laugh, sending cards, leaving messages. I am so incredibly blessed. My cup runneth over.

It has been a huge, huge blessing to have some consistent quiet, to talk to God and really get “into the light” all the things that have been playing in my head and heart since Irina. There has been a lot of crying. I know there will be a lot more. But the fear is starting to lose its power as it is forced out of its dark hiding place where it has been wreaking havoc. I see now that I have allowed it a home there for a long time- way before Irina's death. Now it has been revealed for what it really is by the light of God’s love: a lie whose only power is in deceiving me that it was true. His perfect, undeserved love is casting out fear.

And I am thankful, even though I would not have chosen this path. But my Father chose it, and He loves me and He sees so much more than I could ever see.

I read something the other day that said “God’s love decimates fear”. I love that picture of some dark black, ugly thing that hovers over me, and then God’s love comes in and shines on it, and it decimates into a billion tiny, powerless particles.

The truth is now back where it belongs. The sadness remains. I don’t know if that will ever leave. But God is good, all the time. And all the time, God is good. On that truth I will hang my hat.

And in the meantime, I enjoy my coffee, the quiet, my dog faithfully sitting at my side, and the birds singing.